If you never worked in an office you may not have heard these, but I am certain they are common in any workplace. Personally I have worked in three or four different offices and these phrases drive me crazy
1."Shoot you an email" and "touch base" ---Really? "shoot" the email? With a cannon? some sort of advanced rifle? And which base? first? third? home plate?
2.Circle Back--You know what? Let's table this and circle back to it after we've clarified our other objectives."
3. In Concert--"Yes, we are in concert with that date","We are in concert with that concept", "I'm in concert with that point of view"
4.With pleasure-"It doesn't pleasure me to tell you this, but..."---that shit is creepy
5. Drill Down-- Would you "drill down" on this issue?
6.In the weeds--You're "in the weeds."
7."Are we on the same page?"--If we're having this conversation clearly we are not on the same page, so why do you ask
8. Or a cunt will mess around and say something like this-- "We need to leverage our technology to create synergy that will capture the white space in the marketplace while capturing the loyalty of our existing customer-base with cross-sell opportunities."--This means nothing, I dont know what your talking about
9. Paradigm-- Paradigm Shift---does anyone know what this is, have you ever seen one--can a paradigm just get up and shift
10. Let's keep that on our radar
11. "Bandwidth", when used to refer to anything but technology
12. "Wearing hats"-- Let me put my manger hat on, etc, etc
13. "What can I say its a monday"/"Sound's like someone has a case of the Monday's" and "Happy Friday."- are by far the most annoying and are typically used by the most purposeless person in the office, i dont know how to respond to either and I usually just walk away
Other include:
"Batten down the hatches"
"Circle the wagons"
"Hit the ground running"
"Brainstorm"
"Lets get our ducks in a row"
something like this-- "Ok I want you to de-prioritize your current items and make this your primary action"
"pick your brain"
"Working hard or hardly working?"--this is actually one of the most annoying ones
"for your f.y.i."
Other thing I hate are:
-Inspirational messages used in an email signature
-Email stationaries--they usually freeze my outlook
-Any type of acronym
-Unnecessary hand gestures
-Office cliques
-Someone walking up and just standing next/or over me and saying nothing until I say whats up
-Getting trapped outside the office with someone you particularly can't stand, say on a walk to the train station, etc
-Someone trying to be a hero with the thermostat
-Being forced to look at a photo of someones ugly child
-Having your named shortened--typically by a white person
The degree to which these thing annoy is usually dependent on who is saying/doing them
1."Shoot you an email" and "touch base" ---Really? "shoot" the email? With a cannon? some sort of advanced rifle? And which base? first? third? home plate?
2.Circle Back--You know what? Let's table this and circle back to it after we've clarified our other objectives."
3. In Concert--"Yes, we are in concert with that date","We are in concert with that concept", "I'm in concert with that point of view"
4.With pleasure-"It doesn't pleasure me to tell you this, but..."---that shit is creepy
5. Drill Down-- Would you "drill down" on this issue?
6.In the weeds--You're "in the weeds."
7."Are we on the same page?"--If we're having this conversation clearly we are not on the same page, so why do you ask
8. Or a cunt will mess around and say something like this-- "We need to leverage our technology to create synergy that will capture the white space in the marketplace while capturing the loyalty of our existing customer-base with cross-sell opportunities."--This means nothing, I dont know what your talking about
9. Paradigm-- Paradigm Shift---does anyone know what this is, have you ever seen one--can a paradigm just get up and shift
10. Let's keep that on our radar
11. "Bandwidth", when used to refer to anything but technology
12. "Wearing hats"-- Let me put my manger hat on, etc, etc
13. "What can I say its a monday"/"Sound's like someone has a case of the Monday's" and "Happy Friday."- are by far the most annoying and are typically used by the most purposeless person in the office, i dont know how to respond to either and I usually just walk away
Other include:
"Batten down the hatches"
"Circle the wagons"
"Hit the ground running"
"Brainstorm"
"Lets get our ducks in a row"
something like this-- "Ok I want you to de-prioritize your current items and make this your primary action"
"pick your brain"
"Working hard or hardly working?"--this is actually one of the most annoying ones
"for your f.y.i."
Other thing I hate are:
-Inspirational messages used in an email signature
-Email stationaries--they usually freeze my outlook
-Any type of acronym
-Unnecessary hand gestures
-Office cliques
-Someone walking up and just standing next/or over me and saying nothing until I say whats up
-Getting trapped outside the office with someone you particularly can't stand, say on a walk to the train station, etc
-Someone trying to be a hero with the thermostat
-Being forced to look at a photo of someones ugly child
-Having your named shortened--typically by a white person
The degree to which these thing annoy is usually dependent on who is saying/doing them
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